I Can See The Light…

With a history of and being prone to anxiety and depression (which isn’t something I ever really talk about), I have to share that yesterday was a very hard day for me. I wanted to write yesterday but just couldn’t pull myself to find words to put on paper. The best way to describe it is I had this overwhelming feeling of being stuck. My throat and ear were hurting like crazy. It’s so frustrating trying to have a conversation with someone because not only does it hurt to talk, but my speech hasn’t gone back to normal yet so it’s hard for people to fully understand me. Then it becomes frustrating to repeat myself and I just want to give up on conversations all together. I have also been inside the house for many days now laying on the couch just watching TV. I realized I could never be a stay at home mom because I’m starting to go stir crazy. It’s been awhile since I’ve been to work, which most people would enjoy not having to go to work, but I actually love my job and look forward to it. I am officially over eating breakfast foods… We all love eating breakfast for dinner, but that and soup are the other things I have been able to successfully eat. All of these things started to really get to me yesterday and I felt myself sinking into a depressed state and I didn’t like it at all. I knew there was nothing I could do to solve how I was feeling late last night, so I took myself to bed and prayed for a better day.

Today marks one week since I had this completely unexpected and painful surgery. I cannot believe it has already been one week given how far I still have to go in this recovery process. With that being said, I actually woke up with a voice and not in excruciating pain. Even though the pain is decreasing, my right tonsil still feels very swollen and looks huge! I have two days of antibiotics left and I still need my pain medication, but I can finally start to see the light at the end of this surgery tunnel! I will continue to rest and recover throughout the week in hopes that I will be well enough to get back to my daily routine next week.

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